I haven’t been writing too much on the blog lately because a fair bit of pondering has been taking place behind the scenes about this years social media strategy, and the impending blog makeover. In the meantime I thought you might like to read my latest column that appeared in Swan Magazine this month, so here you go.
The dawn of a new year always finds me in a reflective mood as I ponder the lessons learnt last year, and the possibilities of the months ahead. As I write this, during the last weeks of 2014, my thoughts are more circumspect than usual, so too my resolutions.
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Past resolutions usually focused on the C word … chocolate or should I say ‘the absence there of’. On most occasions my resolve would last until Australia Day, although one year I made it all the way to Easter but that year I had help.
‘Help’ came in the form of a full house at the Perth Concert Hall, several vats of fake tan, six judges with pens at the ready, one tiny lime green bikini and me standing front and centre on stage in said outfit.
That year, during the foggy haze after a recent break up, I was guided by ‘friends’ to enter a body building competition. I know I can hear your gasps already. Thanks to Plugger Locket I now know that I was in the midst of a ‘brain snap’. Anyway I accepted the challenge and spent several months training six days a week and living off a limited range of ‘foodstuffs’.
For three months my plate consisted of nutritional items that, while diverse in food groups, had one thing in common, a bland beige appearance. From oats in the morning to egg whites for lunch and rice with boiled chicken in the evening, the word ‘variety’ took a leave of absence from my caloric intake. I lived for my mid-afternoon juicy, sweet raspberry jube reward. I’d swirl the small dome-shaped goodness around in my mouth, sliding it over my taste buds making sure each one received a moment of respite from their bland existence.
Judgment day came and went in as much time as it takes to whisk ten egg whites into a foamy mass, slide them onto a pan, throw in a handful of chives, flip the resulting disk out onto a plate and lament the fact it was dinner, again. In a demonstration of extremely bad timing, the first morning after the competition coincided with Easter Sunday. Consequently everyone arrived at my place laden with chocolates and champagne. Everything a girl with a 6% skinfold would want.
To my surprise the first piece of chocolate tasted like copha, an opaque, colourless slab of fat usually reserved for cementing rice bubbles into chocolate crackles. I instantly spat out the first piece of chocolate, but by the third tasting I was hooked. The saving grace was that I lived in Perth not Switzerland.
According to Leatherhead Food Research, the average Swiss consumes 11.9 kg or roughly 240 chocolate bars a year. Given their proximity to Nestle and Lindt I guess that’s hardly surprising. What was surprising however was that Ireland came in second (9.9), followed by the UK (9.5), Austria (8.8) and Belgium (8.3), mmm Belgium chocolate.
Australia made it into the list at thirteenth (5.9), roughly half that of Switzerland and ahead of the USA (5.5). So that’s about 120 chocolate bars per person per year. That’s a lot of Turkish Delights, Cherry Ripes and Picnics, but I’d hazard a guess somewhat fewer Flakes, Moros and sadly no Polly Waffles.
This year as my New Years Resolution thoughts turn to chocolate once more, my mind has taken a different turn. In the past chocolate always provided me with relief, a small oasis in the midst of a hectic day, or a much deserved reward after finishing a particularly tricky report. The only negativity came much later as I watched the continued weight gain projected before me on the scales. Now, as I sit here one week after the Sydney siege chocolate has been tainted, associated forever with visions too horrific to comprehend.
Throughout the siege I was intrigued by the use of the word ‘incident’. The message was clear, not to let this ‘incident’ change our lives and yet how could it not? Surely there needs to be some sort of personal acknowledgement or recognition of its impact … a New Year’s Chocolate Resolution perhaps.
And so from this day forth chocolate will no longer be my enemy. I will still associate its richness with indulgence, romance, love. But now whenever I eat chocolate, and Lindt chocolate in particular, I will think about things like courage and selflessness while savouring each mouthful as if it were my last.
This piece is dedicated to the hostages who made it and those who didn’t, the brave forces who continue to keep us safe and the dignified response of the Sydney community. Wishing all readers a healthy, happy, safe year ahead surrounded by loved ones … and the odd chocolate or two to help lift our nations average.
To read other articles in Swan Magazine go to Swan_magazine_december2014
2 Comments
Just saying random thought I love the look and feel of WordPress.
Ps. Are you intending to go the PW Festival x
Good to hear you like WP. I have my fingers crossed.
Yes to PWF