How to combat the labels people put on us (Tara Moss The Fictional Woman part 1)

Tara Moss is living proof that stereotypes are there to be broken, and in her latest book, The Fictional Woman, she explores the issue of labels. I was fortunate to listen to Tara speak at the UWA Dolphin Theatre this week, and at the risk of adding another label, what a fascinating woman. It was one of the most thought provoking sessions I’ve been to for a long time. Actually there was so much to ponder that I’ll have to split this post in two, here’s the first.


Tara Moss and Stephen from UWA © The Ponder Room

‘Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me’ or so the saying goes, but what if they do? How can we combat the labels people put on us, especially if they are not a true reflection of ourselves?


Tara Moss © The Ponder Room

You may know Tara Moss as a stunning, statuesque model and author. But you may not know that as a ten year old, when all the other little girls wanted to be ballerinas, Tara wanted to be a writer a-la Stephen King.

With several highly acclaimed crime novels under her belt I’d say see’s filled that dream and then some. And yet for some people the juxtaposition of beauty and brains, or to borrow a phrase from Tara, ‘contempt and allure’, is too much. In 2002 she’s even had to sit a polygraph test to prove she wrote her own books.

Some of the themes in the book are: women in politics, entertainment, advertising, modern day motherhood and body image.

Tara asks audience about Feminism Thanks to Kelly Fagan

One of the underlying themes in the book is the idea that you can’t tell everything about someone from the outside. Labels of gender, age, marital status, income, and disability cannot possibly tell the whole story, so what can we do?

Thanks to Kelly Fagan

Tara advocates addressing labels, name calling, bullying, whatever you want to call it, with knowledge. ‘Knowledge is power’ as we know.

Working in Consumer Psychology I am surrounded by reams of statistics, that provide insight into the true way we live our lives, rather than the neatly tied up boxes we’re often presented, so the idea of ‘stat bombs’ sits very comfortably with me. Little nuggets of information that you can hurl back to the sender, the ferocity reflective of the initial intention to harm perhaps.

Tara Moss © The Ponder Room

I must put my hand up and declare that Tara also had me pondering about my own involvement in this stereotyping. I’m a big part of that boxing or compartmentalising of society, having spent 20 years working with clients who want to segment their customers into boxes, young single female, old divorcee etc. Recent research suggests these boxes are starting to crumble. The rising trend of the ‘Slashie’ is one example of this. An IT Engineer could now hand over a business card that reads, IT Consultant/ Designer/ DJ, as he or she, extends their area of expertise to include what were previously considered ‘hobbies’.



Tara Moss © The Ponder Room

I could go on but sadly don’t have the space. Suffice to say I can’t wait to find the time to read the book. If it is as thought provoking as the talk, there are going to be some very interesting debates happening in BookClubs around Australia. Congratulations Tara on opening the debate, it was a pleasure to hear you speak.

Harper Collins